Friends.....What's the secret?

All my life I've been pretty much a loner.

I can get along with just about anyone, but, when it comes to having close friends- I don't. I have had a few who I THOUGHT were my friends over the years- but it seems that what I actually have is a knack for picking friends who are just posers. You know, the ones who act like your friend until the opportunity to stab you in the back comes along.

It has happened so often that I am actually leary now of making new friends. I sometimes meet someone new and think, "Wow, this person is fun to be around- seems like someone I could trust and have a bit of fun with." And then I remember the times before when I thought the same about someone else and then six months or a year later found myself in a situation where I found out differently- the hard way. It hurts and it hurts so much that I don't want to do it again.

I have four "best" girlfriends friends right now.
One,"R", I have been friends with for over thirty-five years; One,"L", I met in an online dieting chatroom about three years ago and have only been actually in her physical company twice for two days; One,"J", who I am somewhat related to but have never actually met face to face yet; and One,"M", whom I work with but don't see at all outside work.

"R" and I met in church when we were only seven years old. Then we lost touch because we went to different elementary schools. We met again when we changed schools to middle high school and became fast best friends after learning we were dating brothers. We have had our ups and downs- our disagreements and arguments over the years, but none of them over something we did that was an intentional hurt to the other. And certainly nothing so serious we couldn't reslove it. We have gone for several months and a couple times even for a year or more not seeing each other or even getting to talk to each other other than leave a message- but when we see each other or talk to each other again, it's like that time apart has never been- we are just as close as we were before the seperation and there are no hard feelings about it- we know we have our own lives and sometimes it veers off on unexpected courses and we deal with it knowing that if we need help, it will be there if we just let the fact be known. We would move mountains for each other if the need arose. We like to say we'll be friends forever because we know so much dirt on each other we could bury a sky-scraper. We have been thru some stuff together that no one would believe and sometimes we wonder how we survived it all. The simple truth is that we would -and have- trusted each other with our lives.

"L" I met in an online chatroom with a dieting group. I was drawn to her by her quick wit and sarcasm about certain situations we were dealing with at the time. Some we are STILL dealing with to this day. We call each other up and chat for an hour or more sometimes. She and her husband flew up from Florida twice for mine and Paulius' wedding. Yes, twice. (We had to change the date seven times because of the paperwork invloved and the time-frame we had to do it in- God knows if we hadn't loved each other like we do- we would have given up long ago.) Anyway- "L" & hubby came all the way up and helped us set up for the wedding, then basicly threw us the rehersal dinner since Paulius' family couldn't be here for the wedding and then to top it all off, took the photos and made the video of the wedding and reception. They took it home to Florida and then about two weeks later sent us a beautiful DVD of a slideshow of the preps before the ceremony- then the actual video of the ceremony, then a slideshow of the reception and get-away. It was set to music from our wedding and reception and it was absolutely beautiful. They sent all the photos in an album that had been engraved with our names and our wedding date and even sent some enlargements.We apperciate it and have watched it several times over the first yearof our marriage................. Back to my point tho.... I am almost as close to "L" as I am to "R" - the only difference being that "L" and I haven't been thru all the YEARS of stuff that "R" and I have. I can't figure it out- we can discuss all sorts of things with each other and the relationship is almost identical- "L" is a bit more reserved and I don't discuss the "intimate" things with her like I do with "R", but "R" and I grew up together and shared (discussed) the growing pains phase like all young girls do- But other than that ONE distinction- they are the same. I adore "L" and would move the same said mountains for her that I would for "R". She's like a sister to me.

"J" is an in-law whom I haven't met yet face to face. We chat on the phone and e-mail practically every single day. We started out on shaky ground, to be perfectly honest, but around the first of the year that situation changed drastically. We have sent lengthy posts to each other and I feel so close to her now. We have alot of the same aspects of our lives to share- and in a recent post she said that she didn't really feel like we were "related" but she felt more like she had found a new friend. And that is fine with me. I adore her and respect this newfound relationship with her-we also chat about some of the darndest things.....whenever we get chatting thru the mail our hubbies ask if we are writing a book. The answer is-Not yet but that may be a future project....Right, "J"? ;-)

"M" is a friend at my job. We are very direct and straight-forth with each other and she is the one of two persons there whom I know I could count on there if it hits the fan. I work in a very high pressure atmosphere and you learn very quickly who you would and would NOT be able to trust with your life should a "situation" arise. She is one of two people there to whom that applies. We joke and cut up and when I can't get out and the pressure is on- she brings me either a cup of coffee made just the way I like it- or she brings me a HUGE cup of ice so I don't get dehydrated.
She has been there cheering me on when things got rough and I was crying upset about the stress of the position- and she was there to almost literally hold me up when a situation got to be almost too much for me. If she reads this she will know which situations I am refering to....I could tell you all- but then I would have to shoot you.
Just kidding- suffice it to say we do work in an enviroment where privacy is imperitative.
Anyway- my point here is- that as close as we are at work- for some reason we don't get together outside work. We have been invited to some "functions" but one or the other of us has had things come up that prevented us from doing so. Maybe someday that will change.

The other situation I can't seem to grasp is "couples friends".

Never have I had couples friends who me and my significant other go out with. It has always been I have my friends- and they have theirs. I have never been able to find couple who are compatable with me and my S/O. I can't figure it out. Either they are friends with me or they are friends with him.........never both.

I see and hear about other friends who have couples friends who go out to dinner together- or get together for drinks and cards or maybe trivial pursuit or some other shared interest game- Or they take trips to the beach or mountains together- what is the SECRET?
Is there a book or manual I haven't read available?

If you know the secret to garnering "couples friends" or hear of one of those elusive manuals being available- let me know.......................

Women Drivers!!

Women Drivers are the worst. No doubt about it. I AM a woman and I know.
I even had a long discussion written out to prove my points, but I decided to be straight-forward and direct instead. (How often does a woman do THAT???)

To make a LONG story short, sweet, and to the point, let me just say this.......

If the Supreme Leader of the world said to me ...
" Sunny, if you will give up your D/L forever and either walk or have a male chauffeur you around wherever you want or need to go- then I will take away ALL womens D/Ls and Women will be forbidden to ever drive any vehicle again....."

I would gladly hand it over to her.

(Face it- We may be HORRIBLE drivers, but someday SOON we ARE gonna RULE THE WORLD!)

Nut Case Monthly

WARNING- THIS BLOG CONTAINS MATURE AND INTIMATE SUBJECT MATTER- IF YOU ARE EASLILY OFFENDED- OR ARE A FAMILY MEMBER -BE ADVISED THAT IT MAY CONTAIN INFORMATION YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT.

We women are nuts- absolutely certifiable.

Every month I go from sweet adoring wife who would do anything for her husband to mean obnoxious hag from hell in the space of about a day an a half.

I'm serious.
I have told my darling husband that after a certain date he should just get out the handcuffs, shackles and gag, and chain me in the basement for a week. I equate the whole process to becoming a werewolf. Actually, I think a werewolf could be a lot NICER than a woman on her menses.

I'll go thru this from time slot to time slot, refering to the dreaded time as GROUND ZERO.

One week before Ground Zero- I am fine. Typical conversation between hubby and myself as I arrive home from work....

Him:" Hi Sweetie! "
Me:"Hi Babe."
Kiss-kiss-kiss.....Hug-Hug-Hug.......
Him:"How was work?"
Me:"Work was work, as usual. How was your night?"
Him:"Fine- Worked on my book- played a few games on the computer, read about half a book"
Me:"Great! Glad you got around to reading the book- it's due Friday isn't it?"
Him:"Yep, and I'll be finished by then. Would you like some breakfast?"
Me:" That's sweet of you, but how about I make breakfast for you this morning since you made it yesterday?"
Him:" Okay, Love you!!"
Me:"Love you too."

Two days later....
Sittting together watching TV.
A program is on we both normally enjoy watching, but I am beginning to feel a bit antsy. I don't know why. I just want a bit more attention than he is giving me at the moment. I sit and stare at him for a while- hoping he will catch the hints I am obviously throwing his way.
He doesn't catch them.

I sigh loudly and turn back to the TV. I watch a bit more and then get up and wander around a bit, walking in front of him and the TV several times hoping he will catch the hints I am obviously giving him another chance to catch.
He still doesn't catch them.

I walk past him again and sit heavily back down on the sofa next to him and give another long sigh as I lay my head on his shoulder.
He looks at me and smiles. I am somewhat pacified and watch the rest of the show with him altho I for some reason find it nessecary to change positions several times to make sure he knows I am throwing more of those obvious hints for him to catch, but when the day ends, he still hasn't quite caught it- altho before the week is over he will certainly GET it.

Two days later........
I awake from sleeping, turn over and hubby is sleeping so sweetly beside me.
I snuggle up and he snuggles back- and falls back asleep.
This is frustrating........and a bit more than mildly irritating. How can he sleep when I want to cuddle?
I snuggle closer- wiggling quite a bit more than I have to to become comfortable. He sleeps on....
Dammitt- I want attention- I want it NOW- I "accidentally" wake him up- that ought to do the trick.
"Sorry" I say sweetly and cuddle back up. "S'ok" he says.
And promptly falls back asleep.
Loud sighs- gone unheard because he's back asleep........ I finally get out of bed and dress....of course I make as much noise as possible and have to climb over the side of the bed a couple times before I find my sneakers. I go to the kitchen and bang the pots and pans around - not because I'm going to cook anything, mind you. Just because I am feeling VERY antsy and cranky and I want someone else to give me some sympathy and attention and they can't because they are sleeping blissfully in the bedroom.......... I then go to the den and put the TV on- and knowing how he hates to listen to the DIY decorating shows- I turn the sound up to 3/4 volume. My reasoning?
If he can't sleep- he will come and do one of two things- either get up and come get me to go back to bed(therefore giving me the attention I want WHEN I want it-) OR- he will get up, get dressed and get me to turn the dreaded DIY show off and we will do something together(therefore giving me the attention I want when I want it).

i.e.- I get my way.

Sometimes it works - sometimes it doesn't.......

Ground Zero- but before the actual menses show their presence......

Same conversation as a week ago. but in GZ time........
HIM:"Hi Sweetie"
ME:"Hey Babe."
He tries to kiss me- I give him a quick peck and go to the bedroom- all I want is to get these damn work clothes off- I hate work- I hate the drive every night- I feel like crap and I don't want anyone else to feel better than me.- And don't be so damn perky and smiley either, dammitt.
Him:" How was work?"
ME:"It was crap- I hate that damn place. Everyone is rude and obnoxious and I get crap for evrything- whether it's my fault or not......... Where the hell is my damn sneakers? Why is it that every time I come home everything is moved around?"
HIM:" I'm sorry work was bad baby- can I make you some breakfast? And BTW- Your sneakers are just inside the closet- I put them there when I hoovered last night."

Oh............Now you would think I would feel remorse for being such a bitch..... but I just want a good row right now...........

ME:" Well, you would think you would put them back where I had them- that way I wouldn't have to hunt for an hour after working all night. My back is killing me and I am so hungry I could eat a horse- the LEAST you could have done was had a pot of coffee waiting for me while I waited on breakfast, but nooooo--- I have to make my own damn coffee."
Cue me stomping off to the kitchen.....

He stands there looking at me with a look of pure bewilderment on his face, not knowing what the hell has happened to his sweet adoring wife- and probally wondering if he has any chance of making it to the door and locking me inside before I have a chance to rip him limb from limb and have his liver for breakfast.

He wouldn't have a snowballs chance in hell.


I then go to the kitchen and make breakfast myself, all the while making as much noise as possible (and mumbling under my breath about nothing specific- just all the sailor words I have learned and a few I have made up)- this time because I AM going to cook something, and cook alot of it as well, dammitt. I cut my finger and this absolutely infuriates me- so I take the knife and go outside and throw it into the nearest tree trunk....It quivers in the tree for two minutes after I go back inside. That ought to teach that bastard knife a lesson.....

I finish breakfast and take a couple of tablets. My tummy is cramping now and my back is hurting. I have a massive headache and ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING is pissing me off. And on top of it all- I am in need of a serious lovemaking session.

HMMMmmmmmmm...... Let me just say it's damn hard to convince your man to give you some loving when you can't find him because your man is cowering in the back of the closet of the guest-room holding his breath because he's afraid if he moves you will find him and dis-member him.

DAMN HARD.

Let me just say- I know what a nut case I am- I admit it- and am sorry for it- and if there was ANY way I could controlit - BELIEVE me- I WOULD!!!- But I can't- no matter how hard I try to control it- I know it's going to happen and I have TRIED to control those urges It's impossible- Honestly and truly, it IS.

So sweetie- Let me just say... From the first day I snap at you- give me three days- and then, while I'm asleep- get the cuffs out and snap them on as fast as possible- As a matter of fact- slip me a Mickey just to be safe so I don't wake up til AFTER they are on.....then drag me to the basement and shackle me to the pipes in the cage and lock it for 7 days- not a second before. And leave me there.....


Just for good measure, maybe you should load the gun with a whole clip of silver bullets.
Don't lay it down- and for God's sake- don't fall asleep til after the 7th day.

I am- after all- good as gold for the other almost three weeks of the month........

Home Sweet Home

Listening to the radio today on the way home got me thinking.....

The DJs seem to think that there is one place we all consider our real home. It's the place we go to be comforted and feel safe. Our safe haven.

But what is it that MAKES it home? And why do we feel that way about one particular place?

I admit that for the longest time after being on my own, "home" was my parents house. It was the place I went when I was hungry-(usually for a particular food my mom baked which shall remain nameless)-, too cold, too hot and needed air conditioning, or needed a safe place to stay when things got rough in a relationship.

I had my moms shoulder to cry on and my dads advice to soften the blows life had to dish out for me.

But sometime in the years that followed, things changed somehow.

I no longer feel quite as needy as I did when I was younger and when I go to Mom and Dads house, it's just that- their house and their home. It's not my "home" anymore, altho if a major catastrophy hit me- it would still be the safe haven it has always been. Technecally I still live at home- We, (my husband and I), are living in my parents guest-house on the back side of their property while we save a bit for a down-payment on a new home- but it's not really what I consider "MY home" either.

I honestly don't think I have ever had a place of my own that I have ever considered my true home. I think the closest I have ever come to a place like what most people consider "home" was a little place I rented about 4 years ago. It was a very small, one bedromm apartment out in the country. It was a converted basement of an A-frame house and had just been remodeled. It was barely 400 sq. feet of living space. It had salmon pink carpet in the living room and bedroom and my furniture was mostly black so I felt like I was living in a Victorias Secret ad most of the time.

I was working night shift at the Police Department and it was three weeks before I got everything unpacked and actually got to sleep in my bed in the bedroom at night like a "normal" person. I was in bed and about 3AM I woke up and lay staring at the stars...........wait a minute- STARS????

Yep -The previous owner had despised the low ceiling in the bedroom and had gotten some of the glow in the dark stars-(the tiny ones)- and put about a thousand all over the ceiling. He must have put some time into putting those stars up because he had some of the constalations up there. You couldn't even see them in the light, but at night in the dark, they were beautiful.

After that, my "home" was there. The place I went to get away from it all and relax. I truly understood the meaning of "My own home" after that.

But then I moved where I am now to be near my parents and altho I love the place we are now- it hasn't quite acheived the spot in my heart that the apartment did.

My husband and I will be buying our first home together in a few months and knowing us, it will become the "home" I yearn for. We are gathering things that we love to put in our new home and with all the love and care we give each other- it will surely transfer to our house and transform it into our "home".

BTW- Thank you, Paul, for the most amazing first year of marriage!
Happy Anniversary, Sweetheart!!

If It Weren't For Bad Luck.....

Why is it that I have such BAD luck?

Not ALL the time, mind you- just when I have something special planned. Or more to the point- when I have ANYTHING planned.

If it's not totally spur of the moment- I may as well forget it.

I have been planning a special weekend for six months, requested time off at work that long ago. My boss moves heaven and hell to give me the days off -even to doing my job himself- and a number of things happen.
First we have a medical emergency in the family. I can still do my special thing, but I feel a slight bit guilty even so.
Then it decides to rain- of course we had an outdoor evening planned.

Bad part is- this is the third set of plans we went with because we had the first two sets of plans messed up by something happening and us having to re-vamp them.

It's not just big things either. It's small things, too.

We plan to go for a long ride in the afternoon, it comes a thunderstorm with rain and hail so bad we can't see to drive and have to come back home- or don't even make it out of the driveway.

W plan a romantic dinner and buy all our favorite foods....get home, begin preparing the dinner and one KEY ingredient is either missing or has somehow managed to go bad on the trip from the supermarket to the house.

I plan to spend an hour or two soaking in the tub and preforming "Goddess Maintainence" for a special sensual night with my hubby....and ten minutes before my time set aside for it, it suddenly blows up an electrical storm (I refuse to bathe when it's lightening outside)- or the water main busts and there is no water.

I want to watch a movie on the TV and the electric goes out.

I am on the way to a dinner or wedding with the window down and an auto drives by and hits a puddle and splashes mud all over me.

I bake a cake for a special occasion and being helpful someone picks it up to carry it for me- and they trip and fall.

My car won't start on the day I have a job interview for a position that pays twice what I am making now and in which I would only have to do half the work. Not only that- but I can't get in touch with a single person I know to give me a lift to the damn interview!! Of course I don't have enough money for a cab because I put my last fiver in the tank of my CAR so I wouldn't have to get petrol on me gassing up on the way to the darn interview for the job.

Or maybe the car does start by some miracle and I hit the toll- road and at the toll-booth reach for my change only to find my little nephew has nicked it for the ice-cream truck. Needless to say, I miss the interview because the toll police pull me over and I have to explain the whole situation.
The cop laughed so hard he decided to not give me a ticket after all- and He actually paid the toll for me.

See- all those things have actually HAPPENED to me.

I wonder whenand if it will ever end...

I have a feeling that on my way to my funeral, the hearse door will come open and my casket will fall into the middle of the road and my body will roll across the pavement into the ditch, which of course will be filled with mud because it will be raining.

If it weren't for bad luck.........

Creative Macho Shows

..... American Chopper.... Monster Garage....... Pimp My Ride......

Most men love creative shows like that. It's just a fact of life. Most women can walk into the house at any given time and pretty much figure if hubby is watching TV- it will be one of those creative macho shows. Men like to show off their skills in creating and building. They love to DO things.

They turn off the TV and decide to take a walk around the property to get some fresh air and excersize- you know-check things out. They walk around and head towards the back of the estate...and lo and behold- they find a treasure trove of unused materials....old furniture- stored autos in various staes of disrepair, spare plumbing supplies, electrical supplies, and building materials. Why- those guys on TV would LOVE to have this stuff.

Wait a minute! Inspiration strikes!!
A smile spreads across their face- Why they could do something creative just as easily as those TV guys!! All they need, really, is an old empty shed or shop.

Wait a minute! They HAVE a shop/shed/garage!! It's a bit messy- but if they sort it out a bit..... Yes- thats EXACTLY what they will do!!

They go to the shop and begin sorting the assorted junk that is cluttering the shop(usually things from other inspirational projects that have fallen by the wayside), and in an afternoon have a thouroughly sorted and organized workspace. Very proud of themselves, they go back to the treasure trove and begin hauling the peices they want to the workspace.

Into the evening, sounds of banging and screeching metal come from the workspace- as well as some pretty weird smells. When you go to investigate, you are turned away at the door. Seems that female hormones are detrimental to the creative thought process of the male species. So into the wee hours of the morning, the work continues. Finally they come to bed.

Next morning, the female usually wakes to an empty bed. However, the male has made a pot of coffee and left a note saying he is off to the local builders mart to pick up a few supplies.
He returns as she is sipping her second cup of coffee and she watches as he unloads some very suspcious, expensive looking cartons from the truck into the shop. She tries to go see what the purchases are- but is still denied entrance into the workspace. She decides to go to the mall to do a bit of shopping herself- (serves him right for not sharing the experience with her, don't you think?).

Over the next two days she hears many sounds coming from the workspace.....lots of grinding, sanding, hammering, hissing, squeaking...Sounds she can't even describe. Some sounds-such as the cursing and shouts of pain, she won't bother to describe - we all know them.

Third day- she is sipping on her coffee and watching as the male is dragging the materials back to the place he got them- currently being described in very colorful language as the "junk pile".

He comes in and as she hears the shower start she walks out to the shop. Inside is a neat tidy workspace. All ready for the next "project'.

Hearing the sound of the TV click on and the familiar strains of the current Macho TV Show coming from the den, she walks in and kisses him as she sits down to watch with him.

At least it got the workshop/shed/garage tidied up.

Men, you gotta love'em.

A Simpler Life

Sometimes I want to go back to a simpler life.

I just get so tired of always being "on call", so to speak. No matter where I go and how hard I try to disappear- someone always manages to find me.

Pagers, cell phones, GPS systems....where does it end? When will the implant chip be installed?

I don't care that you can't find anyone to work for you- I don't care that you need a ride to the library-(which BTW is only 6 blocks from your front door). I don't feel the need to come look at your precious puppy pee on the newspaper! So what?

What I DO need is some serious undisturbed downtime. Some time to be away from all the electronics- all the TV announcers yapping about their new and improved products that they are sure I absolutely cannot survive without, all the deafening head-banging non-melodic noise they have the audacity to call music, from all the telephones ringing, the cellphones tinkling out their electronic jingles, all the auto engine sounds, the puttering motorcycles and lawnmowers and the incessantly barking dogs.

I want to be able to hear the birds, the water running over the rocks of the river, the crashing waves at the ocean. I want to hear the squeak of the hammock whilst I swing and feel the wind in my hair- without the odor of petrol mixed with it. I want to smell fresh bread and chocolate-chip cookies baking and coffee perking. I want to feel the water on my skin as I swim in the pool and the sun on my face as I relax on the lounge. I want to be able to read a book without having to get up and DO something. I want to eat if and when I'm hungry- and I want to be able to sleep if and when I am tired. No schedules- no pressures.

I've had it with so called "modern technology" for awhile. I need a vacation. I need to relax.

Sometimes I don't WANT to be found!! So when I dissapear for a few days and tell you I want to be alone- leave me alone and let me have at it til I can deal with it again.

Please.

Changing The Rules

Every relationship has a point where it happens. Some of us try it when we're still dating- some of us wait until we've been married a few weeks, some have the idiot idea to change the rules after a half-century. But we all do it. Don't we?

My husband and I are approaching our first anniversary this weekend and I am happy to report that we have made it thus far without a single serious argument. Quite an acheivement considering the fact that we actually had been in each others company for approximately 3 months before getting married.

We met over the internet and became pen pals- different countries- an ocean apart. Pen pals for more than two years before we actually met face to face. During that two years, we became best friends. We e-mailed each other, we chatted on the phone an hour every day, (Bellsouth and AT&T loved us and sent us B-day and Christmas cards each year), we spend his 6 week holiday making trips to different states along the eastern seaboard. We discussed everything under the sun and debated everything as well. We knew where each other stood on almost every possible subject.

And so far "The Rules", as we defined them, haven't changed for us.

But other couples have their own set of rules. You know the ones-What they consider cheating, what they consider flirting, where the defining lines are not to cross. And the rules do change with each new phase of the relationship. When they get in trouble is when they make the big commitment-no matter what phase that happens to be- and then decide to start changing the rules. Usually without discussing the changing of them with the significant other.

All of the sudden, things that were a big no-no aren't quite so cut and dried when a cute co-worker seems to be hanging aroung becoming more of a friend than they were 6 months before. Suddenly having a drink or two doesn't seem like such a big deal before heading home. And then the following week, or month, it doesn't seem like such a big deal to go to their house instead of the local bar & grill for that drink. Pretty soon having a swim in the pool there isn't such a big thing either. Neither is skinny dipping the following month. And then things aren't so fun at home anymore. Because the rules have changed. There is now another more seamy set of rules that apply to the relationships between the committed couple and the new friends couple. YUK!
Too much.

On the less serious side there are also the simpler rules that change. The unspoken but understood rules, like bathroom time is private time. The first time you're both late for work that one goes completely out the window and it is HARD to go back to PBT, (Private Bathroom Time) , once that happens.

One of my personal favorites is when the female says not a word about the male putting the "seat" down while they are dating. Then after they are committed it becomes a huge point of contention.

Excuse me- But WE don't put the seat UP for them- why should they have to put it DOWN for us? And why doesn't the female bring it up before the "commitment"??


Why is it that most people think that just because they love someone they have to do everything together?

Or the exact opposite- why do some people begin to think that they don't want to do anything together? One or the other of the couple begins to want to do things seperately? Go out with "their" friends. Go for trips or vacations by themselves. I even know one couple who have been married forever and they go out and go to seperate spots for dinner because they can't stop thinking of themselves long enough to compromise on a place to eat! What the heck kind of a relationship is that? When did they change the rules? More importantly- why did they change or why did they LET them change?

If the rules of the relationship change at some point- will the relationship change? Will it change and make the relationship stronger- or will it ultimately destroy it?

Or worse than either- will it just stagnate?

This is in no way a reflection of how I personally feel in MY relationship- I am still the clingy one in ours to be honest. I WANT to do everything together- The shopping, whether it's at the Dress Barn for me a dress or at the local Home Depot to look at power tools for my husband, or at Toys-R-Us shopping for a new toy or game for us. (Yes we actually DO). I want to ride to the mountains together and have picnics, pay the bills together, snuggle on the couch together, cook and clean together, fish and shoot together. I have had enough of doing things on my own and I adore spending time with my hubby.

BUT- on the other hand, I don't mind the occasional time spent apart when he is target shooting and I am reading a book- or whether I am off fishing while he is catching 40 winks before dinner.

I don't think anything will change for us because we discuss everything together- and that's OUR set of rules.