Dedicated to Clay-

 I've been debating posting this life story from my memoirs...

It has to do with one of my sons (Clay)when he was around two and a half or three, and he's passed away almost twenty years ago so no one can rag on him about it. I don't think he would mind anyway as he had a great sense of humor and would always be telling stories to make you howl with laughter.  It's one of those stories that we can laugh about now as adults, but it wasn't a laughing matter in any way shape or form when it happened.... 

His Angelversary is coming up next month and he's been on my mind quite a bit, so Son, this one is dedicated to your uncanny ability to make us all laugh no matter what the situation was...

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Back in the day, when parents decided to have an adult summer get together, we normal people had it at home, in the backyard or in the house after the kiddos were tucked away in bed for the night or conversely, we sent them to le Grandparents house for the night.

Well, Husband #2 and I decided to host one of those parties, and there were three stories from it that became legendary.  Le Grandparents had plans that night, so the kiddos got to stay home and was tucked away in bed for the night as our guests started arriving. There were the usual snacks and dips and such plus a huge cooler of PJ we had made up that morning. It was a simple party- just for gathering our friends together and creating some memories together. 

Not we were all enjoying ourselves, there was much storytelling and a bit of underlying shenanigans going on (that's a story for another time tho) and after darkness started descending, most of us went inside the house for the continuing fun. (Skeeters are HUGE and will try to tote you off into the woods for a feast of their own if you stay outside too long after dark here)...We were all about feeling the effects of the PJ by that time.

I periodically checked on the kiddos every half hour or so and they were always sound asleep, but when we moved inside when I checked on them, it roused Clay up enough that he wanted a drink of juice. I went and got it for him and then got him tucked back in bed.

Now Mind you- we had about 40 people in our home that night- and most of us were inside. So about 10 minutes after tucking him back in bed, I'm sitting on the sofa talking to our guests, and we hear a scream and the pitter patter of little feet running down the hallway heading to the living room with him wailing in pain- it was one of those screams that you KNOW as a parent.

He comes running into the living room, training pants down to the bottom of his butt cheeks and clenching his penis. All the Boy-Moms know immediately what has happened. He immediately spots me and runs over and sobbing and yelling "Mama, it HURTSSSSSS, Kiss it and make it better!!!!" and just keeps repeating it over and over while I'm trying in front of 40 guests to pick him up and comfort him whilst trying to explain to him that this is one Boo-boo Mama can't kiss and make better.

I'm pretty sure I don't have to explain what happened, but just in case, Clay was just over getting potty trained and new to using a regular sized toilet. He had gotten up to pee, raised the seat but not pushed it back all the way and then laid his little man part on the rim of the toilet in totally the WRONG spot. The seat was just far enough "not back all the way" to fall forward at the slightest bump and the little round spacer part that keeps the seat from touching the rim and stabilizes it fell directly ON said man part.  I wince now just thinking about it.

For their part- the guests were all quiet during this exchange- The men understood with sympathetic pain the gravity of the situation for Clay, the women understood my pain as well of having used the age old mama fix for boo-boos and having a child believe it was "mama magic" but not being able to use it on probably the greatest pain he had experienced in his short life. He wouldn't understand for years why mama just wouldn't use mama magic, but yes- he laughed about it a few years later.

So...

Moral of the story is: 

Think Before Starting the "Kissing the Boo-boo to make it all better" magic. Turns out that magic is very site specific.

SMH..... Kids.

(It wasn't too inappropriate, was it?)