Time For a Change- But Not What You Think

 Did I mention I have arthritis in my right side? Everything- ankle, knee, hip, shoulder and wrist. Everything hurts. I had a surgery for carpal tunnel on my right wrist years ago and that helped a bit. The arthritis seems to flare when it's storm season tho still.

Well, about 3 months ago now my left wrist has started to show the same early signs as the right one. It hurts to drive, to write, to type, to cook or clean, and most importantly- to use a keyboard to game. ;)

I've got a doc appointment to have it looked at Friday. Already wearing the wrist support brace like when it started in the right wrist.

Now I didnt start out playing on a PC- I started out on an Xbox. With a Controller. It was soooo frustrating to learn to use the controller. But I did it.

Then I got a gaming laptop and realized that  using a keyboard was so  much more straightforward than a controller. So for the past thirteen or so years I've been using a keyboard.

Well, the pain from "running" everywhere when I'm hunting in a game (Very awkward positioning of the fingers and thumb) has really become so painful I almost cry. My sister, who games with me sometimes, noticed and bought me an Xbox controller so I wouldn't be in so much pain- therefore I can game more often. I love my thoughtful sister. Only she would notice and do something like that!!!

Now, mind you, I have been playing Ranch Simulator for about  five years. Have almost 3k hours invested in this one game- it's my fav, can you tell? I've been playing since the early release days- one of the first to buy it on release day. Had a bit of input into how it was improved and what bugs it had that needed to be fixed. I got my daughter playing it about 6 months after that and now finally got my sister playing. 

I love this game. It gives me the freedom and quiet I cant find in my daily life.  In it I'm a property owner- and I can build and hunt to my heart's desire. If I'm frustrated, I can load the game and  head off to the hills to hunt bear and wolves and foxes and deer to vent my frustrations with real life. Everyone benefits from it and best part- I dont have to spend real life money to drive to do it!!! And if I want some company- I just let Baby Girl or Sis know I'm going to be on playing and I host a fun hunting party!!

Now, having played so long I pretty much know all the little tricks and tips and shortcuts. (altho the new fishing side quest has me stumped- still can't catch a fish for love nor money....YET).

Sometimes I just go hiking to see what can be seen or done. I know they keyboard commands like a pro on this game. Mainly because I don't play games like a normal person and by just going on hikes and building and such I've memorised it- It's like being blind from birth and having learned it bit by bit and I'm in control. 

But-not so much now. A TINY bit of using the controller came back as second nature, but now I'm like someone who went to bed able to see and woke up totally blind... sis has always mostly played her games with a controller. So now the roles have reversed. I'm having to ask her where is this command or that command again? Which one picks things up- and how the hell to I access my weapon quickly?.. what is the process again so I don't die when attacked by a wolf or bear..... (you learn to save everytime you pass a save station and I've adjusted my Auto-save to 5 minutes now vs 20 minutes on keyboard.)

I also don't have a comfortable desk to work from. I've been playing sitting on my bed or on the sofa. But that has got to stop. Today I plan on going and getting be a comfy supportive  gaming chair- not one exclusively made for gaming but a desk chair of some sort that works for me. I might be able to convert my old sewing machine cabinet into a small computer desk possibly.....or I could make one like I did my vanity table when I was in England with a couple of file cabinets  and a lovely piece of wood. I actually have my old round coffee table in the basement that is too big for my Living room, but cut in half with a half moon cutout might be just the thing I need for a vanity table/computer desk for my bedroom. 

I'll have to look into it.

Anyway, It's going to be fun to  re-learn controller commands.... my sister and daughter are laughing at me because I'm playing like a newb... I wont get out of the vehicles in Bear or wolf territory. LOL- I'll get over that- as soon as I can have a few days of playing around with it a bit with no pressure to HAVE to do anything.  I hope.... 

Death Count from Day One(yesterday) using the Controller- 2

The Joys of Change!!!!

It's Not Always A Migraine...

 The past week and few days, I've had a horrible migraine that I just can't seem to get rid of.

My son brought his Blood Pressure monitor with him when he came to stay his birthday weekend with me. His Birthday was Saturday and we really made a weekend of it.... or that was the plan.

He measured his sisters first, then he hooked me up to it. 

To say it wasnt good is the understatement of the year.

177/105.... The migraine was my blood pressure rising steadily. 

I was able to stop taking my meds last year and control it by diet and exercise- just like my blood sugar levels. But something(I have plenty of ideas what those somethings could be) has triggered the issues again and I need to get it all under control again . I simply do NOT want to have to go back on a dozen meds every day to keep everything regulated. I refuse.

I'm guessing the stress of my family being sick from the moldy basement the landlord is too cheap to fix, my job(several issues in that one I won't go into again because there's nothing I can do to fix them and those who can fix em wont), the long tedious commute back and forth to work every day alongside the ever-rising price of fuel, my slow  and steady weight gain that isn't being arrested no matter how careful I am with my diet and exercise, my attempts at container gardening seem to be going nowhere fast(we are in extreme drought alternating with heavy thunderstorms and its still not helping the veggies at all...) a couple of family drama issues going on aren't helping matters either..and last but not least- not having any vacation days in two years..... I'm pretty sure that is a BIG contributor right up on the list with the mold thing. 

I did do a couple of paintings this weekend for my besties birthday this coming weekend, and that really was helpful- it calmed me down a bit altho my BP numbers didnt lower but one on the bottom number.  I'm just really upset that I couldn't do more with my son on his 44th birthday because I had to stay still and quiet and comfortable to keep my BP from elevating even higher. I was already in prime Stroke territory and I most surely didnt want that disaster added to my list of Sh!+ that's going wrong.

On the upside, I have a quiet celebration up in Easley planned with my two besties this weekend for their birthdays so it's almost like a mini vacation for me.

I'm praying it's the respite I need.

    

Our Ray Of Sunshine .....

 Today I said goodbye to one of my work friends.

Her name is Barbara and she is/soon to be was/ the company nurse.

As long as I have been here, she's always been going about her business with a smile on her face and nothing but good things to say about any situation. She's been a breath of spring to all us around her. I will miss her dearly as she always brightened my day when I was struggling. 

Good Luck with your retirement Ms. Barbara. May you always feel as joyful as you made us feel!!! xxx

AI Mudslinging...

 First of all, I hate AI. 

Second of all, I hate Mudslinging, particularly in Political campaigns.

I have a hard and fast rule- play clean. If you indulge yourself in a mudslinging campaign, you will NOT get my vote. Even if I have to write in Mickey Mouse or Goofy as my choice of candidate.

If you can't win an election on your merits alone- you're not the candidate for me.

So now the hopefuls are REALLY playing dirty by using AI generated Mudslinging. 

It's already hard enough to weed out the facts and it's now doubly  difficult to judge what is REAL and what is AI nonsense.

Why do candidates think it's fair play to Mudsling at all? Now they think it's a good idea to create drama with AI as well? 

Why would I trust anyone to lead the country with that type of mentality? 

Stop it you IDIOTS! 

Rock and a Hard Place... Here or There.... Stay or Go??

 It's all about the job.

Fighting battles just to see someone else undo everything I have built up. 

No Rest for the weary and burnt out.

Something has GOT to give... and I'm done giving.

Decisions, Decisions.

Not At All The Relaxing Weekend I Had Envisioned!!

  So... this weekend wasnt as relaxing as I thought it was going to be. 

It didnt rain nearly as much as the "Weathermen"/"Meteorologists" had predicted!!! Bloody Liars. But I suppose it was okay. My sister and her friend delivered a new(to me) top loading washing machine. It works divinely!!!! Sooo happy about that!!

Then my daughter got a call from her eldest- Lexi thought she might be in actual labor and Julie had agreed to come stay with the other 3 babies so TJ and Lexi could enjoy being with and focusing on getting to know the new baby after it was born before coming home with her.

That's 4 kids under 6 years old. Mercy.

I also got to meet my sons newest addition this weekend. Levi is now 4 months old. After the visit-(he was napping so didnt get to hold him or anything...) me and my daughter got about 7 miles down the road and I said "OMG- WHYYYY did we not offer to keep Levi for them while they went to Samantha's graduation???" It was too late then tho.  Next time for sure!!!!

Then when we got home my daughter got the call to come to TJ's  and she's been there ever since.  So I tried to watch movies and veg out- but I decided  to tidy up a bit. Now anyone that knows me knows my tidying is more like a spring clean. I SWEPT the living room rug, then proceeded to sweep the rest of the house as well. And then I threw on a load of clothes into the washer to test it out while I washed the dishes and "tidied up" the kitchen.

I cleaned out the fridge, the countertops, , washed the dishes, dried the dishes, put them away and wiped down all the countertops(yes- that's two seperate things for the countertops.) and appliances- Then for good measure I wiped down all the cabinet fronts as well.  Then I noticed the boys had left their socks and a few shirts lying about in the family room so I gathered all their things up as well.  

I cleaned up the front porch when I went out for a breath of fresh air and  a bit of a "break". 

OCD much?

Anyway- the only thing I didnt do that I wanted to get done was mopping the floors. I might get to that  when I get home from work today. Or Not-

So then I tried to get on my Ranch Simulator Game to play with my sis for a couple hours. And guess what? I was BITLOCKED out!!!!! Dang update caused it and I'm gonna find out how to disable that bullshit.(Pardon the language.)

 I was NOT happy to say the least. I was dang LIVID is what I was. I tried and tried to get UNBITLOCKED but they wanted info I didnt have anymore. Yesterday my nephew Craig came over and sat for about 4 hours trying to get it unlocked to no avail. I've got a good buddy who is an I.T. Guy who would have helped me I'm sure- he's offered before, but I was NOT going to message him with IT issues on a long holiday weekend. So....... Craig ended up resetting to factory..... UGH. Then he spent another hour getting me set back up on my STEAM acct.... Bless him!!!! I love my nephew- he's more like a little brother than a nephew tbh.

Funny things is- I couldn't restore my account for love nor money when I bought my gaming laptop and did the set-up, so I had to start a whole new STEAM account. Had to buy my 4 fav games again and everything- start from scratch.

Well, when Craig set it back up after the reset- my OLD account is the one that was restored. I don't know how ... I'm not questioning it. He offered to find my other account but I told him maybe another time. He had done enough for me  after all that.

 It wouldnt let me download any of my old ranches- but its okay even tho I had a ranch that was a 7 year project...an entire community. LOL- so I'm back to starting over again. I don't care. I've got it to play.

I'm just so glad I hadn't downloaded my books I'm writing onto the laptop yet.

Thank Goodness for small miracles. Eh?

So Just NOT the relaxing weekend I had envisioned after all. Roll on "Retirement"......

Vacation Vs. Retirement

 I sincerely hope we get as much rain over the weekend as they think we are going to here in the Carolinas. It will give me a damn good reason to not do a dang thing but get in some R&R. 

I had to face the fact that I'm getting seriously burned out after working two years with virtually no vacation time.  

Over in England I got five WEEKS of paid vacation time including paid holidays- not counting sick days.

Company now? ZERO Paid Vacation Days. Oh sure- I can TAKE a week or two off, but with prices of everything these days- I can't afford to take the time off and lose the pay.  So instead of losing pay- I'm losing my sanity.

Me and the Boss had an almost two hour meeting today to discuss some issues....mostly that I'm having. 

Also tho also for him to remind me that when I reach my retirement age in February I can continue to work my 40 hours here at my job.....he said he REALLY doesnt want to lose me to retirement. I don't think that's going to be an issue with the price of living these days. However, I did tell him I WILL be taking a weeks vacation every 6 months- I don't care if it's a stay-cation and I sit on my backside on my back porch and look at the clouds or the stars roll past- I WILL be taking those two weeks every year. 

Gar-UN-Teed!!!!