Moment of Silence....

 I had something totally different planned for todays post but then I realized what day it was. 

I don't think any of us who were old enough to tell time  and read a calendar will ever forget where we were and what we were doing that September day.

I was sitting on my bed chatting with my friend in England on the phone when the TV cut to live breaking news.

At first we all truly thought it was a plane malfunction of some sort that flew the plane into the WTC building. 

 But then a short time later, the second plane hit the other WTC building. We knew then we were under attack. The came the news of the Pentagon, and Flight 93.

Our world here in the USA seemed to collapse.

But- instead of breaking us, the nation came together and United once again. Strangers on the street helping each other in whatever way possible for whatever reason. People out giving blood. People helping others get wherever they needed to be to feel safe. Family members that hadn't spoken in years because of whatever reason reconnected. Things we hadn't had time for suddenly became significantly MORE important- imperative, even.

People worldwide poured out their sympathy and support for us.

It changed our perspective on life...and death.

 So please, a moment of silence for everything we lost that day 24 years ago... and for the things we gained as well.

We Will Never Forget.

20 years????

 

I was just looking back at a sampling of my posts... can you believe it's been 20 years since I started this Blog?

My how time does fly!!!!

Finally Friday and Autumn is on it's Way!

 

So this morning I woke up without so much as a twinge of pain in my right knee after almost 10 months of being miserable and hobbling around, taking painkillers and using heat and ice and braces of various types to stabilize it. I might to enjoy Autumn yet!!!!

It's been glorious today!!!! I can't wait until PROPER Autumn settles in. I've already put out a few bits and bobs of Fall decor in the Great room area. Just a bit.

I used to only decorate for Christmas, but in the past 10 years I've started decorating more and more for Autumn. The vibrant colors, the smells...nothing beats them. 

Smoke, coffee, leaves, cinnamon, apples, pumpkin spice and sage. Pumpkins, autumn leaves in all shades of red orange and gold.....Hayrides, Scare houses, Hay bales, Apple Picking and Pumpkin selection -eventually for Jack-o-lanterns, raking leaf piles and jumping in them scattering them all over again- such simple pleasures.

Does anyone even do hayrides anymore?

Y'all have a lovely weekend!!!!

Well, that happened......

 So it's been a while since I posted on here (six years and three months to be exact) and a LOT has happened and changed in my life since submitting that last post!

I don't even know where to begin to be perfectly honest. Probably the best way to go is to tell y'all bit by bit over time as it pertains to whatever I happen to be writing about at the time. 

Meanwhile- if you have any questions you can ask me in the comments and we'll see how it goes.

Just to get us started off tho- I'm back in the States as of Feb 29th last year(2024). Just me- Not me and my husband.

It took me only 6 weeks to find a job in my preferred field once I arrived back in my home state. And I've only missed 3 days in the year and a half since I got hired. I love what I do.

No worries, I'm still debating the idea of a Handy Ma'am Service tho-as a side hustle.(see previous post)...

So, I'll be showing up here more often. Probably Every Wednesday or more often if I get enough questions or get the urge to tell yall something. 

Yall know me.

It's so good to be back and I've missed you all!!!!!!!!!!!

Til Next Time...

Handy Ma'am

Okay- so maybe I've been going about this all wrong.

Maybe I need to set up my own shop, so to speak. I know how to do plenty of stuff. I have a lot of experience in loads of things other than office work. Matter of fact- office work is the least thing I have experience in. Mostly what I have done my entire life has been in the home raising kids or in the field as law enforcement in one way or another.
Maybe what I need to do is set myself up as a Handy Ma'am.  You know- go and do all the little things only women seem to know how to do.

*Clean an oven? Can do.
*Bake a cake? Can do.
*Deep clean a room? Can do.
*Organize a pantry or a room? Can do.
*Bake a cracking Mac and cheese pie? Can do. (My sister makes the best one, but mine aint bad.)
*Bake a Mile High Apple Pie? I'm your girl.
*Banana Pudding? - or any other Southern Treat- I'm on it!
*Clean your kitchen or bath? Give me a call.
*Rearrange your furniture to give you a fresh new look without having to buy new things? Here I am.
*Want someone to just come and spend an afternoon with your parent(s) so you can have a break? That would be me- I would love to meet some new people and most people over here are fascinated by my Southern accent when it's on full draw. I have 3 different Southern Drawls...one I use for the office, one I use for most people out of the office- and the real one I grew up with that generally only my family understands.
*Need a mediator for a squabble? I'm completely unbiased and will give you my honest opinion and help you settle it.(Lots of practice with children in that area.) 
There are so many things I can do to make a person's life easier and bring in me an income at the same time.
If it's not illegal or immoral, I'm good to go.

I'm not even joking y'all. Would it work or not?

Fed Up and Frustrated

Sorry for the rant, but I'm at my wit's end.

Well, here I sit- Exactly 6 months and 7 days after being let go from my position.
I'm fed up- frustrated- and ready to give up.

I've applied for admin jobs similar to what I had at my last place of employment- I've applied for  reception jobs like I was doing at Lockheed-Martin when I was working with American Security.  I've applied for gate reception- at the Waste Treatment plant. I've applied for cleaning jobs. I've applied for House sitting, sitting with the elderly, hospital sitting jobs, jobs entering and logging lab samples at a clinic, fast food joint jobs and even Dog walking/pet sitting jobs.

I'm getting not a heck of a lot in reply-just the occasional phone interview or a recruitment company calling with offers of jobs in London(way too far away and I cant relocate) or offers of jobs I am completely unqualified for. I know that some jobs dont even look at the CVs for 3 or 4 months after advertising it- but surely something would have come thru by now.

I'm frustrated to the point of tears and anxiety attacks. I just dont have a clue as to what to do or what to try next.
I've prayed about it. I spend at least 3 or 4 hours a day on weekdays  scouring the job websites, I've cried, I've thrown temper tantrums raging at why I'm not getting a response to anything. I've tried giving it a rest for a couple days until I'm in a more positive frame of mind.
Nothing is working.

I'm not used to this- I have never been let go from a job before. I've always had another job lined up before I left a job and always been welcomed back to companies I've left because I was a good, hardworking, and loyal employee who didn't leave them in the lurch. And I just dont get why I'm having such a time of it finding a job this time. Unless it has something to do with my age- and I certainly hope it's not that- I have a LOT of good years left and I fully intend on working as long as I can. It would be nice to retire at 67 or whatever the retirement age is now- but I dont see that happening unless I win the lottery- and even then I would work out my notice to my employer if I was employed.

I'm seriously thinking of trying to sell some of my paintings. I mean what's the worst that can happen? I will be in the same position I am at this exact moment- still waiting on a job- and if I did sell one or two- it's a bit of extra money. Better than what I'm making at the moment and worth a try, I suppose. As my sister said earlier today-

Even in her dark hour, she is giving those who need it Hope for a brighter future. Thank you Sissy.

If anyone has any ideas then please - give your advice- I'm open to suggestions!!!!!

Getting Better @ Life...

I sit here reflecting on my life so far, and I have to ask myself- Am I Getting Better at Life?

I think in some areas I am.... I'm a bit more cautious about taking on challenges, but if it's something I am determined to do, I certainly will take it on.

I have improved my housekeeping skills most certainly. I'm not sure why I thought that my partner and i would share all the responsibilities in our lives- call me naive or whatever, but when I was young I always thought that if a couple married or lived together- Life would be a big party of getting up together, going to our jobs, coming home and sharing cooking duties and taking care of the kids- swapping off chores- and during the weekends, sharing yard work, doing projects around the house and having a blissful time. The American Dream, right? And when things didn't go the way I thought all my life that they would, I balked and went on strike. Why was I doing all the housework and keeping the cars up and the yard-work when I had a partner that was just as capable as me?
Yeah- since then I've learned that's not the way it works. The way it actally works is- You get up, go to work, come home and then the woman works her ass off while partner gets a much deserved rest with his feet propped up for the rest of the evening.
At the moment I'm not working at a paying job- and doing most of the housework only seems fair- for now. But before this husband- my partners would do absolutely DICK ALL around the house. No matter I was working too- The house was MY responsibility- as were the kids(fair enough- they were MY kids after all and ultimately my total responsibility), but the cars and the the home repairs and remembering where everything is and always being responsible for knowing where everything is at all times- all the shopping- ME.
I dont know- but I'm pretty darned sure I didnt get married to have another child to look after- I got married because I loved and trusted that my partner would stand BY me- not sit down and let me carry the entire loads while he supervised and I highly suspect that's why those relationships didnt work out longer than a few years.
Present hubby and I have been married for 15 years come May and known each other for 20 come October. I'm not sure it's because it's that perfect or if it's because I finally decided to just live my life as tho I was alone on a deserted island and it is all up to me- but some things are taken care of by a magic helper. Either way, I'm happier with the status quo...He goes off to a job every day(until I get working- then we both will again), he pays the bills, I ask him once in a while to take out the bin bags and he does at least one load of laundry every weekend and hoovers occasionally without me even having to ask for help. He takes care of his G-pig (That was the deal tho- I didn't want a rodent as a pet but told him if he wanted one he was going to be SOLELY responsible for it all- cleaning the cage, bathing it, feeding and watering it. I dont like it- I dont go near it- except if he's laying in the cage and I think he might have died- That's happened twice to me- and yes I cried and once even had to call hubby home from work to take care of it cause I was so upset. I may not like them, but I do get sad when anything dies- even throwing out a dead plant upsets me.) If anything NEEDS doing and I need help- I know I can count on hubby to do it if I ask for help. I do try to be as self sufficient as possible tho. And while I'm not working I look for jobs and I keep the house tidy and I have his dinner waiting(or close to being done) when he comes in from work. We are good together. That part of my life is on point.
Some Other Areas, not so much.
I'm not living the healthiest lifestyle I could be. I do try to cook healthily, I know for a fact, tho, I don't get nearly the activity I need to during the day. I do a workout for at least 30 minutes a day- but I should do double that at least. I imagine I would be able to shift this weight if I did- and I will try to do as soon as the weather gets better over here where I live. Right now we have gale force winds and lashing rain and temps still near freezing so I'm not chancing going out and breaking my foot in 3 places again like I did a few years back. I visit the doctor way too often as it is without adding to it. I'm overweight, I have high blood pressure, I'm in the Type 2 Diabetic range and am hypoglycemic, I have arthritis in my hips and leg joints and I have gawd awful migraine headaches that put me in bed for a couple of days at a time. But I'm working on getting all that under control.

I have good relationships with all my family members- ACED that one!!

I have lots of interests. I bake, crochet, draw, paint, love to decorate, re-arrange furniture, craft, sew, do flower arrangements, I do a bit of photography now and then, and am learning to speak Italian and to play the banjo.
I love to write- I have three blogs and presently am working on writing four books- all in progress at the moment. I also have accounts with Facebook in which I admin several groups and pages, along with an account with Insta, Twitter and Snapchat -altho I rarely use the Insta or Snapchat.

I try to keep as busy as possible because I also have serious depression. Brought on by several things. I lost my dad and my son within less than two years of each other. I've lost a home- one that was custom built to my specifications- and that incident contributed to some pretty serious trust issues in my life for sure....I've lost a job recently- from the first and only company I could see myself retiring from(but that wasn't meant to be, apparently). And I'm having a much more difficult time of finding another job than I thought I would. I'm 3500 miles away from my family-I really only have one friend over here and I dont drive anymore. I also lost two of my "adopted sons"-they were actually my best friend's sons who were as much as part of my family as a blood family member. I've known them since they were born and all our kids grew up together side by side like siblings.

I'm becoming a hermit.There are days I dont want to get out of bed- and sometimes I just dont. There are times I dont feel like talking with anyone- and some days I dont. There are some days I cry all day- And there are some days I just want to give up..... just go to sleep and never wake up- but on those days- I force myself to get up and do something- anything, because otherwise I know I'm lost.
I tell myself I am Strong- that this is NOT the worst day I have ever had- And I can make it thru this one- just like I did yesterday and the day before. And I will tomorrow. I am Goddess. I am Valkyrie. I am the daughter of strong people. I have a strong support system, people who love and care and will "talk me off the ledge", so to speak.
And so I go on. One foot in front of the other...

So....... in the grande scheme of things- I'd have to say yes- I am getting better at life... or at least working my way round it's obstacles.

And that's good enough- for now.