Saturday, April 05, 2008

Families.

Well, I seem to be mending nicely so far.
I know I've only been home a day and a half but this morning I actually woke up hungry which I haven't done in almost three weeks.
I'm still very weak, and can only stay up for at the most three or four hours before succumbing to a nice long nap, but that's to be expected, I suppose.

I was planning on canceling our family cookout for next weekend, but my kids insist not....they said they would take care of everything and we all NEED that together time, now more than ever. So, I get to have all my babies at home again for a few hours.

So Sunday Afternoon it is, then.

I'm glad I have a sweet family who support me. And Paulius' Parents are just as sweet helping us out like they are as well.

Paulius and I were watching an episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond" the other day. It was the episode where Amy's parents come to take her back to Pennsylvania because they don't approve of her wanting to get married to Robert, Ray's brother. The entire two families were bickering and Amy finally had had enough and had locked herself in her bedroom. Ray finally had had ENOUGH and went to her door and yelled for her to stay in there- as FAR away from BOTH the families as possible because "no good can ever come of families".

And he was right in the reasoning that a family that constantly bickers and nit-picks about everything can't do a couple any good and they would do well to stay away as much as possible from the stress of it all.
But my family, as much as we bicker (and a couple of us have MAJOR issues with each other) we still leave those issues behind when there is a real need for our support.

My oldest younger brother and I haven't spoken once since my Dads funeral, but he was there for me when Clay had his accident. And we haven't spoken since either.
My two sisters are off and on again but for the most part they are upset with each other most of the time and not speaking....they have major issues with each other, but whenever a crisis arises with one or the other of them, they drop everything and run to each others side.

Sometimes things come up that is more hurtful than others and it causes a permanent break in a familial relationship altogether, or sometimes it's just the final straw. I have seen that happen as well.
All I can say is sometimes things can be mended, sometimes not- and I tend to just sit back with a wait and see attitude rather than try and push issues, or get them out in the open and resolved. If it's going to happen, it will- if it's not, it won't -and trying to MAKE it so only makes things worse, so just don't bother.
Not worth the aggravation and only causes more upheaval.

Luckily since my kids got married there hasn't been one major argument in the family unit that is specifically mine- me, Paulius and my kids. There has been before with boyfriends that Julie has had that her brothers wanted to beat the slop out of that they wouldn't be specific about but just gave a "He's not good enough for her and we have our reasons for thinking so"(Men are always a mystery when it comes to protecting their females)- and girlfriends who Julie wanted to beat the slop out of because she knew they were cheating on her brothers.(Julie has always been more vocal about EXACTLY what she's upset about.) But now everyone gets along and we all help each other out when we can and we give specifics when we have a problem with someone, which hasn't happened in a while.
*Knock on Wood.


Well, my strength is about to run out on me again. This little bit has taken me an hour to get down, so I'm back to bed for a while.

And for a final smile - Ray told his mom when she turned the "MOM" look on him about his "No good can come from family?" remark....

*(whispering)"I meant HER family, ma."
Yeah, of course you did, Ray.



Later Y'all.

2 comments:

lolly said...

Oh families are just great. I love mine to bits - but lately I could throttle the breath out of my mom for making waves between me and Toby.

Anonymous said...

Having come from a dysfunctional family, I admire people who can have normal relationships within the family dynamic. Having people watch your back and love you no matter what you do is the best feeling in the world ... but I've found it mostly in my "family of friends."

Keep getting stronger, Chosen Sis.
Hugs and smooches,
L